Yesterday, I took part in my first Aquathon. I’ve debated whether or not to write about it. I wanted to blog about my experiences, then I completed the event and didn’t want to, then I changed my mind.
Lucy of Paddle, Peddle, Pace posted on Facebook that her club Havering Tri were organising an Aquathon with a choice of distances. I fancied doing something different and despite being a pretty terrible swimmer, I decided to have a go at the super sprint distance (200m swim, 3k run). My technique is poor and I get tired quickly, but I knew I could splash my way through 200m. Having completed 4 marathons and being that I run several times a week, I wasn’t concerned about the run. A sprint distance was also available, made up of a 400m swim and a fun sounding 5k route.
By complete coincidence, Fitness First, Hammersmith got in touch to offer me some swimming lessons (more on this is a future post). I jumped at the chance to brush up on technique and to feel more confident before Sunday and Jono kindly gave up his time to work with me on drills and to build up my confidence. Although he broke me Friday, I felt more confident and he assured me that I had made improvements. I definitely knew I could cover the distance now.
But Sunday came as a complete shock. I faffed about worrying what to wear, before opting for a sports bra under my swimsuit. Although it was windy, it was also a warm day, so I laid out one of my running skirts to pull on over my swimming costume in transition and I took care to put talcum powder in my socks to pull them on quicker. This turned out to be a nifty trick, not that I was concerned about saving time in the end.
Havering Tri are a really lovely and welcoming club and the event was well organised and marshaled. The super sprint group were set off in the pool first – there were just 5 of us, so I had the luxury of a lane to myself. I only had 8 lengths to swim, I didn’t have to share a lane, no need to worry, right?
I set off for my first length, doing front crawl, trying to pace myself and remember what I was taught and it went fairly well. Then as I turned around to come up again, I saw how far behind I was and started panicking about what the hell I was doing there. I told myself to calm down, it didn’t matter and off I went, but I’d unsettled myself and my breathing was all over the place. This meant that because I felt I couldn’t breathe, I didn’t put my face in the water. Halfway through the length, I was close to a fully fledged panic attack. I somehow got to the end of the length and nearly burst into tears. Instead, I was trembling, my pulse was racing and I couldn’t breathe and then I was hyperventilating.
Yep, I picked 50m into a 200m swim as a great time to have a panic attack. I don’t know what happened. I just suddenly felt out of my depth, if you’ll excuse the pun. Then I started panicking because everyone was witnessing this and that made it worse. And then everyone else was out of the water and I’d done two lousy lengths and the next wave couldn’t start and that made me feel even worse.
The wonderful marshals were supportive and reassuring and I’m almost crying again writing this, but thank you Havering Tri. Somehow, they managed to calm me down enough for me to go off again, albeit it on my back this time as I was just too freaked out now. I ended up stopping every length, but eventually, somehow, it was done. I don’t know how, I genuinely thought I wouldn’t be able to continue after the first two lengths.
I headed out to transition where I discovered I felt drunk and that my legs didn’t work anymore. I managed to pull my skirt, socks and shoes on and headed out on the 3k run, which was three flat laps around the playing field. It was supposed to be a run, it was more of a drunken shuffle. I had been warned that my legs would feel odd as I moved from the swim to run, but I wasn’t expecting them to feel like lead as well. I didn’t time my run and I’m glad I didn’t as I think I would have depressed myself – it was definitely my slowest 3k ever! I never really got my breathing under control from the panic attack during the swim and I was just relieved to finish.
The club were wonderful, they knew I was embarrassed and upset after the attack and did everything they could to support me round. Lucy’s husband, Glen, and Lucy both gave me a quick hug at the end and assured me that it happens to everyone at some point.
I felt better after getting changed and a chat with Lucy and enjoyed watching the finishers come in from the sprint tri. Glen finished third, so that was a pretty good effort!
I have no idea what happened to me in the pool. I’m not uncomfortable in the water, despite not being a great swimmer. I went diving last week and loved it. Whether it was the combination of trying to remember what I’d learned, the nerves and the realisation that I was so far behind combined, I don’t know, but it was upsetting and scary. I nearly didn’t write this post, but I finished the race and that’s what matters.
Yesterday, I was saying never again. Today? Today, I’m feeling like I want to go back next year because I need to put the demons to bed.
Thanks Lucy, Glen and the gang at Havering Tri for looking after me yesterday. I might see you next year!